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How to tell you’re dating mommy’s boy

A man’s emotional attachment to his mother is not a bad thing, as research has shown that men tend to get closer to their mothers than their fathers. Many people think that being a mommy’s boy is a terrible thing. 

Let’s delve into the actual definition of who a mommy’s boy is. 

The term mommy’s boy or mama’s boy is slang for a man who has an unhealthy dependence on his mother far into adulthood when he should be independent and self-reliant.

It’s lovely to find a man that is close to his mother! It demonstrates that he values women.

There is, however, a distinction between a man who loves and is close to his mother and a man who is a momma’s boy. For example, the former will occasionally phone his mother to give her updates on his life. The latter will ask his mother for assistance in selecting a tie for a workday. The former will have mastered proper dishwashing techniques. The latter will be perplexed as to what a dishwasher does.

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Table of Content hide 1Signs or characteristics of a mommy’s boy 2Guys with mommy issues 3Here are signs to check if your man has mommy issues 4How to handle mommy’s boys

Signs or characteristics of a mommy’s boy

Some characteristics or signs show that you are with a mommy’s boy. These signs are:

  • Tells his mother everything: It’s not a terrible idea to tell your mother about everything that happens in your life. However, as a guy matures, it is only normal to reduce the amount of information he shares with his mother. A mommy’s boy, for example, will inform his mother about everything, including minor details such as what to wear or eat.
  • He values her opinion over yours: A mommy’s boy always values the view of his mother over anyone else, even if that person happens to be his significant other. He sees the advice of his mother to be more valuable than any other person’s advice. For instance, if a mommy’s boy is about to take a crucial step, no matter if a million people give him the green light on the idea and his mom says no, he automatically takes her advice.
  • He compares her to you: A mommy’s boy will always compare you to his mother. In his mind, nobody can do anything well except in his mother’s way.
  • He always takes her side on every issue: One major characteristic of a mommy’s boy is that he always takes his mother’s side, even when she is wrong. His mother can do no wrong and is always perfect in his eyes. Once you notice your man making a statement like, “What do you expect me to do? She is my mother.” That is a sign that you are dating or married to a mommy’s boy.
  • He can’t survive independently: He can’t do laundry, cook a meal, or unclog a sink. He thinks loading a dishwasher is rocket science, and he can’t remember the last time he drove himself anywhere because his mother always insists on driving him.
  • He expects you to be exactly like her: A mommy’s boy always holds his mother to very high standards. He believes that his mother is the perfect example for every other woman, including the person he is to marry. He expects you to talk, act and behave like his mother.
  • She shows up unannounced: A mommy’s boy sees nothing wrong with his mother showing up at his house unannounced. He will likely give her the key and access to every room in the house.
  • She is the first person he calls when something happens: She is always the first person he calls to share anything, whether good or bad.
  • He doesn’t defend you: He never has your back when she starts yelling at him about all of your flaws. And when she makes snarky remarks in your face, he ignores them and acts as if he isn’t aware of them.
  • If his mom does not like someone, the person stands no chance: if his mother doesn’t like someone, especially when it comes to choosing a life partner, then the person is out. When he introduces his significant other to his mother, he always wants her to behave in a certain way because he wants his mother to like the person.

Guys with mommy issues

In its most basic form, mommy issues are troubles that a grownup carries over from childhood to adulthood due to their relationship with their mother. 

While we usually associate this word with men, mommy issues can also affect women. 

When a man has mommy issues, he can fall anywhere between these two extremes: he’s either excessively attached to his mother or entirely estranged from her. Neither of them is healthy for the guy.

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Here are signs to check if your man has mommy issues

  •  Constant contact with his mommy 
  • Avoids anything that has to do with his mother.
  • He is suspicious and insecure.
  • He always thinks you will hurt him.
  • He feels entitled.
  • He will do everything his mother tells him to do.
  • Difficulty spending time with or discussing their mother.
  •  A habit of dating people that share similarities with his mother.

How to handle mommy’s boys

If you are in a relationship with a mommy’s boy, here are a few tips that can help.

  • Establish clear boundaries: The first step is to communicate and set boundaries for the relationship. Let him know that you are not his mother and cannot act like her. Also, he must learn to act like an independent person who can take care of himself.
  • Avoid confrontation: When dealing with sensitive issues like this one, it is not in your place to speak to his mother about their closeness. The best person you should talk to is your partner. Since it is a very sensitive issue, talk calmly to him and not with a harsh or angry tone.
  • Seek professional help: If you realize that your partner’s connection with his mother is getting intolerable, and you’ve tried everything you can think of, and it still isn’t working, it’s time to seek professional help from relationship counsellors.
  • Encourage him to take responsibility for himself: Making his own doctor’s appointments, keeping care of his finances, and even doing his washing are all examples of how he may accomplish this. Instead of reminding him how stupid it is that he relies on his mother for these things, push him to do it independently, assist him, and then congratulate him on doing it without her.

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